The
Heart of a Mother
By Rose Barbour
With her broken heart
She prays each night
Hoping for the day
That her child will see the
light.
Feeling alone in the darkness
Her heart can hardly bear
The thought of her child
Sleeping on the street
somewhere.
There is no rest for the weary
As one crisis follows another
The pain runs deep
In the heart of a mother.
Not much help to be had
Only stigma and shame
As she suffers in silence
In this deadly game.
The strain on her family
And relationships, too
But, she loves her child
What is she supposed to do?
It takes a strong mother
To love one with addiction
Why she was chosen
I believe, is God’s
recognition.
He knew she could handle it
He knew the depths of her love
He knew he could trust her
With His child from above.
This nightmare may have made
her
Question her faith
But, I have no doubt that in
Heaven
For her, God has a special
place.
Written by: Rose Barbour
Dedicated to all the parents who are carrying unbelievable burdens. I know you don't feel like it, but you are strong and amazing. After all, this journey is not for the weak at heart.
It is a long hard road to travel. I lost my son to this terrible disease and every day my heart breaks. I have such an emptiness inside me. A hole in my heart. Loving an addict is not easy, but when it is your child it is even harder. You feel so helpless because you cannot fix them. A mother should be able to fix everything for her child. Her child is a part of her heart and soul. Always and forever. Never give up. I miss my son so much.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss. I just cannot imagine that kind of pain, and pray to God that I never experience it. It is so unfair that you had to bury your son. It is a terrible disease. God bless you.
DeleteAs the mother of a recovering addict, I know exactly how helpless one feels. We try to do whatever possible to help our child stop using but no matter how much we do its never enough. The pain and torture we went through watching our child literally destroy herself ripped our hearts out. We needed to get help and fast....We could focus on nothing else for 6 long, hard years. During that time we prayed with all our hearts that our child would "come back" to us....that the tormented creature that had taken her place would go away. We love our child always and forever, but there were days.....Never give up fighting to stop the stigma, and for easier access to treatment!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment. Yes, this is a very difficult journey that only another person who has gone through it could truly understand. I am so happy that your daughter is in recovery. It truly is a gift. My son is in recovery as well. We are so grateful.
DeleteTo Anonymous I know how you feel i lost my oldest son almost 4 years ago to this disease life has not been the same since and every day i miss him that much more but now im dealing with my youngest son and addictions and it makes it that much harder as im afraid of losing him also if he doesnt take the help thats been offered to him but one thing i have been learning through all this is i can only do so much and hope and pray that he will make the right choices i will continue to fight for the help he needs and it also helps me that i go to the 3 C's group on tuesday nights as im opening up more and know im not alone out there and i finally feel that im becoming stronger through all this but at the same time i know that i myself still have a way to go. SO my heart and prayers go out to you too
ReplyDeleteI am so glad that you come to the 3 C's and that they are helpful to you. Your voice is important in the conversation, and plus you are an awesome person. You've been through so much. I pray for recovery for your son.
DeleteThank you for your sharing Rose your writing always touches my heart. My heart has been broken since the loss of my son. However a broken heart still beats, and life goes on. It is hard to wait in hope that the gov. will come up with a strategy that will work for people of all ages here on PEI. Health care, mental health, addiction services, social services, and our justice system all have to start working together with the community to make this change. Your doing good work in bring awareness to this disease Rose. thank you .
DeleteThank you, Dianne. This is certainly a hard road. I cannot imagine losing a child. I don't know that kind of pain and pray to God that I never do! God love you and all the other parents who are living our worst nightmare.
DeleteYes, the system needs a serious overhaul. The road is hard enough, we don't need to be dealing with a broken system too. Every voice is important in educating the people, which leads to pressure on governments to do something about it. Thank you for all that you do!
As a mother of a recovering addict (4yrs) I want to just send you all love, hugs and many prayers. I still live with a lot of fear..I'm trying to over come it but reality is such a scary thing. God Bless you.
DeleteThank you, Vicki! I am so happy for your your child and you! Recovery truly is a gift. Early on in this journey when my son would find recovery, I obsessed about it as much as I did with his using. After all, we never want to go back to all that pain again. I learned, however, that I couldn't control his recovery any more than I could his using so I lived one day at a time and enjoyed it. I hope that you can get to that point as well. xo
DeleteWOW, this hits home! Thank you
ReplyDelete