Sunday, 7 December 2014

Deeper than the hurt

Deeper than the hurt
By Rose Barbour

This can’t be happening to us
It seems so unfair
A home full of love
How did it get in here?

Claimed by a disease
Ruthless and cold
My child is in a dark world
Where souls are sold.

It is hell on earth
Watching my baby slowly die
God please help us
I don’t want to say good-bye.

So many sleepless nights
Spent tossing and turning
I’m praying for a miracle
My stomach keeps churning.

There are no guarantees
Some will never get well
This life is hard
It is worse than hell.

But despite the heartache
And all the work
I love my child
Deeper than the hurt.

Written with love for every parent whose child is struggling with addiction. We are the ones who have had our love tested in ways that others could not even imagine, yet it endures through all the pain. It is unconditional love and it runs deep. Addiction may redefine how we love but it will never change our level of love. We will always love deeper than the hurt.


  1. Beautiful, powerful words, Rose. Thanks for sharing. it is so important for all us parents of addicted children to remember that they have a disease and not to let that disease destroy the love for your child. That love may be the only thing keeping them alive.

    1. Thank you! I absolutely agree with you. Love is the light that will lead them out of the dark place. It is the greatest power we possess. Addiction is ugly but our children are in their somewhere. Let's be the beacon of light that brings them home.

    2. This disease of addiction is so powerful. I didn't realize how powerful until I lost my daughter, Kaitlin five months ago. She will forever be 28. Prayers to all whose family members are struggling with this disease.

    3. I am so very sorry that you lost your precious child. I could not imagine that kind of pain. Hugs.

  2. Every SUD in recovery ,that I ever spoke to, shared ,"if it wasn't for the love & support of my family they would have given up".Unconditional Love..Well said !!

    1. Thank you! Our children experience negative consequences all the time from a society that doesn't understand the disease and despises them. They don't feel worthy. Our love shows them that they are.

  3. My son became an addict after being prescribed pain killers for kidney stones . It lead to herion. I will never give up the fight for his life. So many people , including family do not understand its a disease . It's ugly and evil. It's not my son. He's been in recovery and has had some set backs , but always fights back and is making progress. It's a life long battle . This blog has greatly helped me. I hope it can really help many families going through this nightmare and fight for their children's lives. Never give up!!

    1. Thank you so much for visiting and commenting. I am so very sorry that your family has been affected by addiction as well. It is a very hard journey but we can't give up, as you said. I hope it gives you comfort to know that my son is 16-months into his recovery and doing amazingly well. They do recover. Hang on to the hope. I pray your son finds his path to recovery very soon. xo

  4. Thank You, Rose! It's nice to have somewhere to talk and have people understand your struggle and pain. I will pray for your son also. We have a prayer list at church . I'm going to join your Facebook page also. I just seen it through this blog. God Bless you for putting this together . It's so helpful.

  5. Thank you Rose, for your beautiful words. I will carry them with me through this nightmare I am living. I hope whatever you do from this point on brings you all the happiness you have missed out on all that time you spent crying when no saw you.

    1. Thank you! I've been blessed with a great support system and with my sons's recovery (two years and counting). Please don't ever give up or lose your hope. People can and do recover. xoxo


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